The tiger mom parenting technique, which is common in Asian families, prioritizes hard work, education, rules, and discipline, over affection and play. These parents have very high expectations for their children and have very strict rules. Children are expected to have stellar grades, and have little leisure time for friends and electronics. This parenting strategy can be unhealthy for children because they are being controlled, have no independence or choice, and are scared of their parents. This often leads to rebellious behaviors, and/or low self-esteem. Although this technique does create a hard-working, and goal-oriented mindset that might help the children succeed in the future, they still will experience difficulties. They might struggle with expressing their emotion because their parents had tough love, rather than affection, and they might have poor social lives because their parents did not allow them to have play dates or sleep-overs. Children from tiger mom parents may be able to achieve great academics and impressive careers, but life is so much more than that.
Jellyfish dads are the total opposite of tiger moms. They are too lenient with their children and give them anything they want. These children call the shots and make their own rules. This parenting strategy lacks discipline, consequences, and structure, which does not prepare children for their futures. Since these parents are basically nonexistent, the children may feel neglected because no one cares about what they do. Also, they may even blame themselves for their parents absence. This can lead to negative self-esteem and no ambition.
The helicopter parenting technique is another extreme. These parents are over-protective of their children and don’t let them do anything because it is too “dangerous.” They are the parents who eavesdrop, spy, and search through their children’s belongings because they are so worried about them. However, too much hovering often leads to revolt and an untrustworthy relationship between the child and parent. Although these children are comfortable expressing their feelings because they have been so loved and nurtured, their parents are failing them because they do everything for their them, and are always there whenever they face an obstacle. Helicopter parents do not understand that children need to overcome some obstacles themselves so they have independence and maturity, which is crucial for succeeding in the real world. It is important to know that in the real world you cannot be dependent on parents.
The ideal way to parent is to have a balance between all three of these extreme strategies. Children should learn about how important it is to earn good grades, but should also spend as much time as possible being a kid because it goes by way to fast. Children should have toys, play dates, and should run around outside so they have creative minds. Today, too many children sit inside watching TV, playing video games, and going on smart devices. Parents who allow excessive amounts of electronics are being too lazy. Parents need to play and interact with their children to establish a healthy and trustworthy relationship. Children who interact with friends and parents, and explore their imagination are establishing social skills for their futures.
Also, I think it is essential for children to be comfortable with their parents to establish trust. In a trusting relationship the parents will not hover and spy on their children because they respect them. An open and trustworthy relationship is necessary so children are not nervous to talk to their parents when they need help, have questions, or are seeking advice. Many children are too embarrassed or anxious to go to their parents when they need help because they do not have a strong enough relationship with them. Although I think a close relationship is essential, parents need to be parents. To explain, many parents try to be their children’s best friend, rather than their parent. In this instance the child disregards the rules and the parent lacks authority. Children need to be comfortable with their parents, but also need to know that the parent is in charge and there are rules that must be followed.
Lastly, it is a parent’s job to worry about their children, but they must let them explore and discover things on their own. Some parents do not let their children do things because they are too protective of them. For example, they do not let their kids get dirty, ride bike, play contact sports, and more because it could be too dangerous. Instead, parents should teach their children to be brave and face their fears, rather than hide from them. This allows children to express themselves and become independent. To conclude, a balance between the three parenting techniques will produce children who grow up to be happy, healthy, and productive members of society.