--Original published at Cecilia's Thoughts

There are many kinds of parenting styles, some similar and some very different and then some in between, from lighthouse to helicopter parenting. Lighthouse parenting is basically to love your children infinitely and let them make their own mistakes and learn from them. On the opposite end of this is helicopter parenting which is called this because the parent hovers over the child’s life from birth on throughout their whole life. This type of parent plans out their child’s life from the very start and micromanages their child with everything. Somewhere in the middle of these two is known as dolphin parenting, this means that the parents set rules and have expectations, but they allow their children to also have independence and to make their own mistakes.

To raise the most successful and happy children I believe parents must be somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, like a dolphin parent. In order to have a this outcome for your child, the dolphin parenting is the best option because it allows the child to see boundaries, rules, and guidelines in a sort, but the child also has enough freedom to make their own mistakes and learn from them themselves. This gives the pathway for a child to know right from wrong because of what their parents taught them, but he/she is not being micromanaged to the point where they experience nothing for themselves. It is important to have guidance from parents, but not everything planned out for the child. Dolphin parenting sums up what I believe is best when raising a child, which I think will raise a happy, healthy, and successful person.

--Original published at Carly's College Blog

When it comes to parenting styles, I think it can be hard to pin point just one perfect style. I feel that when parenting, there should be balance between strictness and how laid back to be.

I want to start with helicopter parents. Helicopter parents hover their child’s every move and decision. They need to know absolutely everything all the time and can even become overly controlling. I think this could cause the child to develop anxiety. It could give them a suffocated feeling and cause them to be constantly worried about the decisions they are making and how they are handling every day situations. However, I don’t think parents should be totally laisse faire. There are certain disciplines in a child’s life where I think parents should be more controlling than in others, such as monitoring their child’s school work.

This brings me to the “jellyfish” parent. Jellyfish parents are extremely laid back and let their children do whatever they want. There are no set rules or expectations. although this gives the child an extreme sense of freedom, I think they tend to have a poorer sense of self discipline. They don’t need to meet any expectations, nd without parents giving them some guidance, may not fully understand which actions could be considered “right’ or “wrong”. Lastly, we have the tiger mom. I view this more overbearing than helicopter parents, personally. They strive so hard to push their children to succeed. I think this can even lead to depression in children who are not meeting the expectations of the parent or parents that are putting the extra pressure on them.

Overall, I think having balance and open communication between child and adult is the key to successful parenting.

--Original published at Chey's Blog

I chose to make an eight stage development cycle like Erik Erikson did previously. It goes as follows:

Infant to 18 Months: Safety vs Fear

18 Months to 5 Years: Moral vs Immoral

6 to 7 Years: Inclusive vs Exclusive

8 to 14 Years: Individuality vs Group Mentality

15 to 20 Years: Identity vs Anonymity

20 to 36 Years: Control vs Crisis

35 to 60 Years: Fulfillment vs Dissatisfaction

60 and Older: Contentment vs Discontentment

Safety vs Fear: When infants are beginning to develop they trust easily, but when they are afraid of something they lose that sense of trust as well as any sense of safety they felt. When there is safety there is no fear. But in the absence of safety an infant would feel fear. An infants interaction with the world around them would teach them what to fear and what not to fear. Parents play a role in that teaching as well.

Moral vs Immoral: Children are taught by their parents what is moral and what is immoral. When children do something ‘wrong’ they are disciplined by their parents. If they do something ‘right’ they are often praised. In early childhood morals are one of the basic concepts taught by parents and that moral compass tends to follow children throughout their lives.

Inclusive vs Exclusive: Children learn what they do and don’t like pretty early in life as well. If children like something they will include it into their lives. If they don’t like something they will exclude it from their lives. For example, if a child doesn’t like peas, but does like grapes, they will include grapes into their diet and exclude peas.

Individuality vs Group Mentality: As children develop into adolescents they learn how they want to express themselves individually. But they won’t always express themselves as individuals. Society targets adolescents with standards and norms to make them feel as though they need to follow the crowd and be part of a group. Their individuality could be hidden by the group that they associate with.

Identity vs Anonymity: During this stage people are figuring out what their identity truly is along with their sexuality. People often express their true identity during these years more than they did during previous years. In opposition to that some people don’t want to be noticed. They blend in with others and avoid being their own person, which is where the anonymity portion comes in.

Control vs Crisis: During this period adults want to have control of their lives. They want to have a plan that is full-proof that they can continue on for the years to come. If they don’t have a sense of control there will be crisis. A lot of people refer to this as a ‘mid-life crisis.’

Fulfillment vs Dissatisfaction: At this stage in life an individual has completed the goals they’ve set for themselves. They’ve done what they set out to do in their life. Either that or they haven’t accomplished these goals and they’re dissatisfied with their life. They can still try to reach these goals or they will settle with feeling despair due to the outcome of their life.

Contentment vs Discontentment: In the late stages of life individuals feel content with their lives. They are satisfied and aren’t wanting for more than what their life has offered them. In contrast they feel discontent. They aren’t happy with the outcome of their life and they end up being unhappy with their last stages.

--Original published at Manami PSY105blog

Why is parenting so important? Because children are influenced by parents. For example, their religion, characteristic, a value of thinking, cultural background and so on is based on what parents teach and what they want their children to be.

I chose option 1 which is about several styles of parenting such as Tiger mom, Jellyfish Dad, and Helicopter mom. Tiger mom is known as Chinese parenting style. Tiger mom tells a child to be always at the top in terms of everything such as academic stuff and sports. Therefore, their children have to follow the strict instructions of their mom and make the best results by working so hard. Compared with this, Helicopter’s mom always pays close attention to children, when they try to experience new things, face a problem, study and so on.

I will focus on Tiger mom and Helicopter mom with my own experience today.

My mom has both Tiger mom and Helicopter parenting styles. I’m from Japan. Japan is influenced by Asian country like China easily. Therefore, it is understandable that Japanese parenting style has also some features of Tiger mom. My mom was a little strict about my academic stuff when I was in an elementary school. I could not have leisure time until my homework and extra study book which my mom prepared for me are done. I often compared with friends who do not have pressure from their moms. My mom also forced me to come back until it gets dark outside and arrowed me to go the only place where she can go immediately when I get in trouble. This thing is categorized as Helicopter mom. From my experiences, there are positive and negative aspects to have Tiger and Helicopter mom. Positive aspects are that children can be protected and can be close to their parents. Moms also can understand their children well. However, children must be depressed when they could not achieve mom’s expectation and cannot be independent. They will rely on their mom forever. There is no best way to grow up children. However, it would be the best if moms picked good aspects from several styles of parenting.

#development

--Original published at Zachs College Blog

The world of the internet and research studies has provided parents with numerous opportunities to help better their ways of parenting and improving their children to be positive towards our society. The first way to be a great parent is by providing your kids with equal and huge amounts of love and support. Being there for your child through the  good and the bad, and loving them through it all. Showing your kids unconditional love can be the best way to keep your child stress free and extremely happy. Being involved in your children life can be one of the most important ways to being a good parent. This means giving up time for your interests and devote that time to your kids needs. Be there for your children through it all and show that you care about their interests in life. As your children grow out of the baby stage, make sure to establish equal rules for them. Setting rules is essential for raising your child right and teaching him the differences between whats right and whats wrong. It also helps show your children to respect you and what you approve of them doing. When your children do need to be disciplined, avoid using harsh tactics like physically beating or abusing your child. Be reasonable with your kid. Every kid experiences being in the wrong but as a parent you need to take advantage of those opportunities to help your children learn what is right. Here I provided you with a few different ways to better your parenting tactics but there are so many more possibilities. Being a great parent and role model for your kids is extremely essential for putting them in the best position to be successful when they become adults and parents themselves.

--Original published at AlyssaM

Parenting is one thing every couple likes to do their own individual way, yet there are some common terms for certain styles like “Tiger moms”. My parents both were very laid back and hardly had rules for my brother and I to follow. One of my friends, Oliver – a sibling of five – was raised completely the opposite, their mother was extremely strict (I never met their father, since he lives in Washington state). Seeing both different types of parenting styles and how the two of us grew up to be, I form my ideas of what I believe to be the best way to raise children to be successful. It may be surprising, but I pick Oliver’s mother’s technique. My mom never required I do simple chores like the dishes or wash, but his did. As a result, Oliver is more hardworking than I am. Any free time, he would find in school such as a study hall, or during theater rehearsal, he was working on homework. If I had a spare moment, I would not be doing my homework, but reading or writing. Once at the end of a youth group meeting, his mother instructed him and his sister to help the staff, with the trash. From then on, it became a habit to take out the trash every week. Oliver’s manners are more well-build unlike mine. The easy way to describe our manners is to say, I was raised in a barn and him in a palace. He carries himself about his days, as regal as a prince, but not prideful, all because of his mother. She always made sure her children upheld the best posture at all time of day, which reflects his entire character. Her strict guidelines shaped him into a wonderful young gentleman and he could easily survive on his own, but me not so much. I never had to do chores, so I do not know very basic skill, like cooking (minus microwavable meals). Having a flexible style being raised, left me wobbly as I now try to learn to walk on my own. Oliver, on the other hand, will have no trouble sailing onward towards the sky. His characteristics are very closely mirrored in his siblings as well, so I was able to conclude it was all how our parents, specifically our mothers raised us.

--Original published at Site Title

Personally, I would not consider any of the three parenting styles the “best” way to parent and raise a child. You need to have a combination and balance of them all in order to achieve the ideal parenting style for producing children that are happy, healthy, and productive members of society.

The “tiger moms” use strict rules, discipline, and overall just drive their child really hard to succeed. These moms use this parenting style to promote success in both their child’s schooling and extra curricular actives, such as sports or learning an instrument. This style often reflects that of a Chinese culture. I think if a child grows up under this parenting they will not be happy with their lives. Not being happy with their lives can result in low self-esteem or depression because they never feel like they are good enough. This parenting can also lead to the development of a perfectionist personality because they grew up in a household where everything needed to be perfect, or else they would get punished.

“Jellyfish dads” have few rules and expectations and are essentially push overs to their kids. When I think of the product of this type of parenting I think of children that are spoiled and disrespectful, because they do not know any better. Due to the lack of respect and the impulsive behaviors these children grow up with I do not believe they would be able to be productive members of society, working for a boss, and listening to someone else’s rules or commands.

Helicopter parents are parents that tend to hover over their child, like a helicopter. They can be overcontrolling and overbearing. When I think of this term I think of a child that cannot do anything without the parent knowing their every move, or even a parent that does everything for their child, such as doing their school projects for them or picking their classes. Although this child might grow up “happy”, they will not develop any life skills because their parent(s) have always been there to do everything for them. This can result in a child growing up to not be able to be a productive member of society, or care for themselves or a family.

Overall, to achieve the “best” parenting style, you can’t pick just one. You have to have balance. There needs to be some rules and discipline, or else your child will run crazy, and can get themselves into some poor life choices. When it comes to extra curricular actives, I think it’s fine to reflect a more “jellyfish” parenting style. If the child wants to be good at something they will work at it, you cannot push them to the point where they hate doing something they once loved or always end up in tears. Being a helicopter parent isn’t always a bad thing either, for example if their child is doing poorly in school, they might need that hovering to get them on the right track.

--Original published at Marlee's Psych 105 Blog

We all know that raising a child is one of the hardest jobs in the world. I’m not saying its rocket science, but shaping a person into who they’re going to be is no easy task. There are many approaches into how to raise your children; some heard of more than others, but yet all effective to some extent. In my opinion, believe that one of the biggest mistakes people can make when parenting is either being too strict or not strict enough. When parenting people need to find a balance that works for both the child and the parents. For example, Tiger Parenting; this is a type of parenting where all control is in the hands of the parent. It is a very authoritarian approach with little good outcome. Children raised in this style can result in becoming diminished and only motivated by external sources. One the other side of the spectrum there are whats called jellyfish parents. In this type of parenting the power is held in the hand of the child. This is where we see children making demands and parents bending over-backward to satisfy their children needs. Now making your child happy isn’t a bad thing but when it comes questionable choices the child is making their needs to be some sort of parental figure telling them right from wrong. I believe that the best kind of parenting is one that is in balance between strict and relaxed. A child needs to have boundaries and be told no from time to time so that they know the real world won’t be given to them on a silver platter. A child also needs to be given the space ti figure out their interests and develop personality without the influence and push of parental figures. Ultimately, the job of a parent is raise their children to think and act independently but, while also making smart beneficial decisions for themselves and others.

--Original published at LivsCollegeBlog

Tiger parents take an authoritarian approach to parenting. There are two different types. Some parents are authoritative “directive,” which means they push and direct their children. On the other end of the spectrum is authoritative “protective.” This is where the parents hover over their children and micromanage every detail of their lives. No matter the type, tiger parents take over their children’s self-motivation or internal control.

Jellyfish parents are more permissive parents. They don’t really care about too many aspects of their children’s lives. They usually have little to no rules, expectations, and basically just spoil their children. Children raise by jellyfish parents tend to grow up with little to no impulse control.

Dolphin parents are the combination of tiger parenting and jellyfish parenting. By nature, they are authoritative. They have rules and expectations, like the tiger parents, but they also value their children’s creativity and independence. They collaborate with their children and guide them rather than tell them what to do or not do anything at all.

By comparing these different types of parenting, I would say that dolphin parenting is the best way to go.

--Original published at Makayla Hockenbrock

Parenting is very difficult topic to discuss. There are so many different variables that come into play, as well as, so many different views depending on how you were raised and how much you know about it. If you say one thing, you could offend someone. Parenting styles are all based on personal preference, but I also believe that how you parent is a reflection on how you were raised.

To produce children with who are happy, healthy, and productive members of society, I feel you need to have a blend of parenting styles. If a parent is to strict I feel the children will become sneaky and get themselves into trouble. If parents are don’t set rules, or ‘parent’ at all, then the kids will feel they are invincible and feel they can do whatever they want without having consequences.

So, what’s the best way to parent in my perspective? I think the best way to parent is as follow: set ground rules, be consistent (if you punish one child for something and the other child does it, punish them the same way), don’t have favorites, do not consistently ask questions about their personal life, be a friend sometimes and not a parent, don’t hover over them, do not push them (if they want to come to you about something, they will on their own time). Being a parent is a difficult task, and by no means am I saying that this is the only way to parent. Many other styles of parenting work well. Parents should want their child or children to flourish in the world and in their community. That being said, parents should not let them be a couch potato. They should want them to be active, curious, and excited to learn. They should want their child to try new things, even if they might fail at the task. Parents should help when help is needed. I could go on and on.

I do also believe that the parenting style chosen to be used also needs to be a good fit for the child. If the child is troublesome, then the parenting style should be a little stricter than if the child was very independent, and the parents had no worries about them. Which ever style is chosen, parenting and being a child go hand in hand, and work together in a way, in my opinion. The best option to choose, when and if you become a parent, is which ever style works best for you and your family.

Best,

Makayla